Thursday, August 16, 2012

"I want to be Pursued" (too)

I loved today's Girlfriends in God post written by Sharon Jaynes about the many ways that God tries to woo and pursue us.  We (as women) love that kind of stuff, don't we? 

When I met Kyle, I was so frustrated.  I had given him my phone number, but several days had passed before he FINALLY called.  Apparently, there is some unwritten guy code of a "3 day rule" (insert lots of eye rolling)!  But when he called, it was the phone call which would change my life.  I knew immediately that he was different...and I even told him early on in our relationship he would be the man I married.  Now, I'm so surprised that comment didn't send him running for the hills...
The truth is, he gave me heart literally fluttered with joy that after heartbreak I was seeing the purpose in my past broken relationships:  God was bringing me to this point in my life, to meet this amazing man He had created just for me, to love and have love me in return... 

Today is our 9th anniversary, and comparing our love story to the love story Christ wants to share with me is hard to wrap my head around.  Like Kyle, God has continually did things for me to let me know that He was mindful of me.  Most recently, yesterday...

I've been going to school to be a teacher for the past 3 years.  To make a long story short, I should have graduated last spring, but once the bottom fell out of the local economy I was skiddish of quitting my job (a job I was blessed to have) to student teach.  I realize that this shows little faith on my part, and believe me, I've spent the past few months living in regret...  Yesterday, I tried to register for one of the SIX remaining courses I need at a local community college, but I was told since my prerequisite was 10 years old, the community college would not accept it.  Didn't matter I have been a student for the past 10 years; didn't matter I already have a bachelors and associates degree; it didn't matter I had taken 5-6 other ENG classes in the past 3 years.  This one class--the only prerequisite--was too old to count. 
I was heartbroken (and may have spent a few hours crying and feeling defeated)...

I couldn't understand why God had given me the desire to teach and a student's heart (a love for learning) to only put roadblocks and huddles up in my way.  I couldn't discern whether this was a "not now" or a "no" from God. 

This is how amazing our God is...

As of last night our preacher asked us to teach Sunday School (5th and 6th graders) for the next year!  It's by no accident that we were chosen for this age group--my teaching degree will be in Middle Grades Ed.   Do you know how amazing this is?!?  The Lord knew I was so discouraged in finishing my degree that He actually provided a way for me to teach until I can finish school!  And if that wasn't enough already, He also led me to apply to another community college who has pulled some strings to get me into the same class TODAY! 

I know the past 24 hrs have been full of instances where the Lord has been pursuing me...

How is He pursuing you?  Are you paying attention?

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Are you Full?

For the past 8 weeks I have been participating in a bible study called "Run 4 God."  This is a unique bible study in that not only are you becoming spiritually fit, but you are becoming physically fit as well.  It's been a hard, sweaty, wonderful, tiring, takes-your-breath-away (literally) journey.  I started out as unable to run 60 seconds without stopping.  Now, I can run 10 minutes and even ran my first mile without stopping!  There are days I still struggle, especially with the humidity and my asthma, but I have learned to call on the Lord when I am weary and He gives me the strength to make it to the next interval.

In my bible study, I read the following passage and it really hit home for me...

"My kids had a pet rabbit for years...over the became difficult for them (kids) to find time to feed the rabbit...One day we went to the cage to find a motionless rabbit.  It had died.  The kids didn't mean to starve it, or want to see their pet die.  But when you don't feed a rabbit, it dies."

I don't eat healthy, never have.  I am not really a breakfast eater, and when I am, my typical diet consists of potato chips and or chocolate bars.  (Potato chips do count as veggies, right?)  But this section really got me thinking of what I'm putting in my body...or more importantly, what I'm not putting in my body.

"Life lessons hurt...when you stop doing the things you need to do, destructive results are my spirit the Lord said, 'You know you should feed your soul with the Word of God.  When you don't, you starve me, because my Spirit lives inside of you.'"


I'll give you a minute to let that sink in.  'When you don't (feed your soul), you starve me, because my Spirit lives inside of you.'

"What you do for your spiritual health you would never do for your physical health.  Not many of us are missing meals.  But many of us are missing our spiritual meals.  When you see the pictures of Africa starving to death, your heart breaks for them."

"Maybe God looks at us in the same way.  Maybe he sees us as a starving malnourished child, barely alive spiritually, and His heart breaks."

---Chapter 8, pages 83-84 of "Run for God" by Mitchell Hollis

Lord, this has been such an eyeopening Chapter for me.  It really convicted me and of the minimal time I make for you.  I have been starving Your Spirit inside of me Lord.  I am so very sorry.  Please help convict me!  While I am making time for unimportant things, convict me Lord...make me remember that it is because of You that I am here today.  It is because of You that I have every single possession in my home.  Whether its picking up a book or flipping on the TV...Lord convict me to ask myself if I've been souled out for You today?  Ask me, 'How can you be souled out for Me tomorrow?'  While I am running Lord, may it be a time that I can grow closer to You...through music, prayer, quoting scripture...In the quiet of my run, may I take the time to listen to You and what you are saying to my heart.  Help discipline me to feed my soul with your Word and things of God just as I would feed my body...may you always remind me of this analogy when I am starving your spirit.  In your precious name I pray, Amen.